Happy 1st Birthday Adam

This past year has been filled with first time we laid eyes on you, first touches, first kisses, first hugs, first cuddles, first baths, first tears, first trips, first smiles, first laughs, first foods, first tooth, first sitting ups, first words, first boo boos, first holidays, first hair cut, first steps, first time in the ocean and now your First Birthday! We have been so blessed to experience each of these firsts and you have made our lives so enriched. We love you so much Adam - today, tomorrow and always! Love - Mommy & Daddy

Still Here

Yes, I am still here. I needed to take sometime to process everything that happened but I am much better now. I had my time to mourn, to be angry and to cry - now I am much, much better and am at the point where I can honestly say that it just wasn't meant to be at this time but I know sometime in the future when the time is right Adam will have a sibling. Right now I am just going to enjoy having my precious baby boy and treasure each and every single moment.

Friday he will turn 1 - I can't believe it! Not sure what we are going to do yet on his actual birthday but on Saturday we are having family over for a small party. We went and saw Santa this weekend - it was so adorable. As soon as I sat Adam in Santa's lap he just looked and looked at him with this adorable face, melted my heart!

It's Over

Just got the news that my level dropped to 25. I have been told to quit taking all of my meds I was on. I am so depressed and mad.

So Depressed

I just got back from the RE's office to do the blood draw for my 4th beta and the nurse that took the blood basically told me that I need to prepare myself for an ectopic pregnancy. I won't get the results of the bloodwork until 3:00 - today is going to suck!

Not Good

So 3rd beta came in at 48 from 33. They wanted it to double and it didn't - so not sure what to think but I am not feeling good about this at all. Now I have to go back for another beta on Monday. I just want this to be over!

Beta on Friday

I talked to my RE last night and she is letting me go in for a beta on Friday. So glad I don't have to stress all week. I also took a pregnancy test this morning and there was a line but it was really, really, really faint so hopefully it starts to get darker!

Miracle - Maybe????

I had my second beta done today and it went up from a 10 to a 33 s0 it more than doubled (which is what they look for). I am a little bit excited but still very, very, very cautious! They aren't having me come back until next Wednesday for another blood draw and then an ultrasound - so another week of waiting! I really wish they would let me come in on Friday just to make sure that the levels are rising. I am going to just try to stay as calm as I can the next week and take it easy so that this little bean can burrow deeper and deeper into my lining and with God's will we will be meeting him/her in August! Thank you so much for all of your prayers thus far but I still feel like we need many, many more!